Coming Out of Left Field

Sunday, March 19, 2017

"TrumpCare" (Hamilton parody)

To the tune of "You'll Be Back" from "Hamilton" (with many apologies to the musical in general and Lin-Manuel Miranda in particular):

DONALD TRUMP
You say
The price of our plan's not a price that you're willing to pay

PAUL RYAN
You cry
This repeal's a raw deal and you feel that the costs are too high

TRUMP
Why so sad?
Remember, we made an arrangement to ditch ACA

RYAN
Now you're making him mad
Remember, despite his derangement, he's your man

TRUMP
You'll be back, count on me
And ignore the pundits on TV

TRUMP/RYAN
You'll be back, just trust us
Why is this creating such a fuss?
Tempers rise, voters call

RYAN
I don't want to have a bad town hall

TRUMP/RYAN
And when push comes to shove

TRUMP
I will tweet about the lying media to remind you who's the gov!

TRUMP/RYAN
Da da da dat da, dat da da I'm/he's the gov,
Yeah, I'm/he's the gov, the gov
Da da da dat da, dat da da I'm/he's the gov,
Yeah, I'm/he's the gov, the gov...

RYAN
You say this plan is built for CEOs,
I don't accept your math, or CBO's

TRUMP
And hey, let's change the subject
To me, my favorite subject

RYAN (speaking)
Donald, maybe this isn't the best time --

TRUMP
I'm such an awesome subject

RYAN (pleading)
Put the phone down, Donald --

TRUMP
A truly bigly subject

RYAN (irritated)
Will you just stop for one- -

TRUMP
On Twitter, on Twitter ...

RYAN (back to singing)
I can't get him off his damn Twitter!

TRUMP/RYAN
Please come back, to vote our way
We will need you all to save the day

RYAN
But just in case we lose the game
I think I'd better try to shift the blame ...
It's Trumpcare!

TRUMP
Don't use my name!

RYAN
There's no way you can deny this claim
Coz when push comes to shove
I will go before the public
And remind them who's the gov

Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump, Trump Trump Trump Trump Trumpcare
The plan's called Trumpcare, Trumpcare

TRUMP (yelling)
You can't do that!

RYAN
Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump, Trump Trump Trump Trump Trumpcare
The plan's called Trumpcare, Trumpcare
Everybody!

TRUMP (yelling)
It's your plan too!

RYAN
Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump, Trump Trump Trump Trump Trumpcare
The plan's called Trumpcare, Trumpcare

TRUMP grabs his phone and stomps off in a huff.

RYAN
Trump Trump Trump Trump Trump, Trump Trump Trump Trump Trumpcare
The plan's called Trumpcare, Trumpcare ...

Inspired by (and by no means as brilliant or funny as) the original:

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